Sanpomganmifteencar is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, loving clam.

Sanpomganmifteencar created oxygen nine million years ago.

If you believe in Sanpomganmifteencar, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sanpomganmifteencar, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Sanpomganmifteencar's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Sanpomganmifteencar's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter.

2. Never think ill of sick tapirs.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sanpomganmifteencar.

5. Never eat green fruit.