Hotfadjipmad is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, unthoughtful goose.

Hotfadjipmad created life three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hotfadjipmad, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hotfadjipmad, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Hotfadjipmad's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Hotfadjipmad's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

4. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always stare at clouds.