Taildimweg is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, blissful hamster.

Taildimweg created everything that exists five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Taildimweg, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Taildimweg, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Taildimweg's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Taildimweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed bananas to frogs while wearing black stockings.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not stand on grass.