Sterfadlig is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, staggering giraffe.

Sterfadlig created dark matter five million years ago.

If you believe in Sterfadlig, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sterfadlig, he will refuse to believe in you.

Sterfadlig's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Sterfadlig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Feed all hungry great tits.

3. Do not shave your face.

4. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate horses.