Gessfit is a god.

She takes the form of a large, self-confident butterfly.

Gessfit created humanity four years ago.

If you believe in Gessfit, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gessfit, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Gessfit's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Gessfit's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never think about black holes.

5. Run away if four aardvarks approach from the west.