Lopbabteen is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, smart naga.

Lopbabteen created the Virgo Supercluster eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopbabteen, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Lopbabteen, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Lopbabteen's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Lopbabteen's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate ants.

2. You must pray to Lopbabteen five times a day.

3. Never think about archaea.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near geese while wearing white dresses.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.