Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, wise newt.

Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag created the world eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate capybaras.

4. Feed all hungry mites.

5. Do not take Parkfotapp Stafhinjapstrag's name in vain.