Rapfomyat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty cat.

Rapfomyat created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Rapfomyat, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Rapfomyat, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Rapfomyat's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Rapfomyat's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never feed lots of gooseberries to goats while wearing brown rings.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never laugh in the presence of eagles.

5. Worship no other gods but Rapfomyat.