Gensaklarp is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, strong gorilla.

Gensaklarp created the cosmos three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gensaklarp, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gensaklarp, he will curse you with boils.

Gensaklarp's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Gensaklarp's Holy Commandments

1. Gensaklarp must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never talk about fluid mechanics near sheep while wearing indigo shorts and balancing seven silver spheres on your arms.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not shave your legs.