Spagbenraw is a god.

She takes the form of a small, generous chinchilla.

Spagbenraw created carbon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagbenraw, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Spagbenraw, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Spagbenraw's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Spagbenraw's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always help great tits in need.

5. Never hurt otters.