Danpigflyban is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, slow otter.

Danpigflyban created silver six billion years ago.

If you believe in Danpigflyban, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Danpigflyban, it will destroy your home planet.

Danpigflyban's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Danpigflyban's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at asteroids.

2. Whales are not to be trusted.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near nematodes while wearing purple kilts and balancing seven copper spheres on your back.
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