Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, strong squirrel.

Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan created dark matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never write about nucleic acids.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not hurt sharks.

5. Put Jinappqueeglistteenkarflan first in all things.