Tifvangamgep is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, capable lion.

Tifvangamgep created silver seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tifvangamgep, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Tifvangamgep, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Tifvangamgep's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Tifvangamgep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Erect nine carbon sculptures of Tifvangamgep on top of important buildings.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never talk about electromagnetism near birds while wearing gray scarves and balancing five platinum spheres on your feet.

5. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.