Mutteenbap is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, intelligent slug.

Mutteenbap created a bottom quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mutteenbap, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Mutteenbap, he will destroy your home solar system.

Mutteenbap's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Mutteenbap's Holy Commandments

1. Mutteenbap loves geese, so they must be respected.

2. Never feed grapes to goats while wearing fawn tights.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never mention snakes.

5. Never write about special relativity.