Hensitjop is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, egotistical donkey.

Hensitjop created a charm quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hensitjop, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Hensitjop, she will have a low opinion of you.

Hensitjop's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Hensitjop's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never think about dark energy near swans while wearing yellow rings and balancing six iron spheres on your hands.

4. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

5. Never talk about moths.