Vonbutvin is a god.
She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, merciful
cobra.
Vonbutvin created the Cigar Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Vonbutvin, she will visit you to thank you.
If you do not believe in
Vonbutvin, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.
Vonbutvin's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.
Vonbutvin's Holy Commandments1. Hide if six snakes approach from the north.
2. Never think about solid mechanics near doves while wearing purple jumpers and balancing seven silver spheres on your neck.
3. Never wear rings.
4. Do not stand on grass.
5. Always help tapirs in need.