Konyartbon is a god.

He takes the form of a small, loving unicorn.

Konyartbon created the planet Jupiter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Konyartbon, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Konyartbon, he will ignore you.

Konyartbon's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Konyartbon's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. You must pray to Konyartbon five times a day.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Konyartbon.

4. Never hurt turtles.

5. Do not trade with those who eat beans.