Homsterbiss is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, self-assured yak.

Homsterbiss created an up quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Homsterbiss, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Homsterbiss, it will turn you into a hamster.

Homsterbiss' most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Homsterbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never sit in the presence of birds.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not hurt sheep.

5. Put Homsterbiss first in all things.