Sanbepvag Did is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, boastful narwhal.

Sanbepvag Did created an electron two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sanbepvag Did, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sanbepvag Did, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Sanbepvag Did's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Sanbepvag Did's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick tortoises.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sanbepvag Did.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate shrews.

4. Never feed lots of oranges to birds while wearing mauve stockings.

5. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.