Hapkadbeprak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, charitable mole.

Hapkadbeprak created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hapkadbeprak, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Hapkadbeprak, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Hapkadbeprak's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Hapkadbeprak's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity.

2. Never talk about aardvarks.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never skip in holy places.