Kaphakyak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, proud duck.

Kaphakyak created the Black Eye Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kaphakyak, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Kaphakyak, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Kaphakyak's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Kaphakyak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Kaphakyak must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never paint your face white.

4. Never write about gravity.

5. Pray towards the west.