Yarltiktif Mincabnan is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, humane hippopotamus.

Yarltiktif Mincabnan created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarltiktif Mincabnan, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Yarltiktif Mincabnan, it will send minions to preach to you.

Yarltiktif Mincabnan's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Yarltiktif Mincabnan's Holy Commandments

1. Put Yarltiktif Mincabnan first in all things.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never talk about galaxies.

5. Never feed lentils to whales while wearing shoes.