Dubrulbeg is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, passionate shrew.

Dubrulbeg created a bottom quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dubrulbeg, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dubrulbeg, it will remove you from existence.

Dubrulbeg's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Dubrulbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always help great tits in need.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never feed lots of turnips to porpoises while wearing cyan corsets.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never eat aubergines.