Kentarpgess is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, narcissistic seal.

Kentarpgess created humankind four billion years ago.

If you believe in Kentarpgess, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kentarpgess, it will turn you into a worm.

Kentarpgess' most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Kentarpgess' Holy Commandments

1. Kentarpgess loves frogs, so they must be respected.

2. Do not dye your hair red.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Do not hurt ants.

5. You must never eat coconuts.