Listtarmeg is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, omnipotent dugong.

Listtarmeg created the Sombrero Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Listtarmeg, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Listtarmeg, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Listtarmeg's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Listtarmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Do not keep three snakes in a large pit.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never feed turnips to great tits while wearing dresses.