Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, quiet chicken.

Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad created silver two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad, he will jump up and down on your head.

Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad's Holy Commandments

1. Lamhogpoprowtimcussgofjad must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not eat melons.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always treat rats with great respect.

5. Never mention snails.