Lipfonmad is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, passionate fish.

Lipfonmad created light nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Lipfonmad, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Lipfonmad, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Lipfonmad's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Lipfonmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at comets.

2. Always make sure there are no geese in a room before entering it.

3. Never write about chlorophyll.

4. Do not shave your chest.

5. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.