Cisstanlim is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, cheerful weasel.

Cisstanlim created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cisstanlim, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Cisstanlim, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Cisstanlim's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Cisstanlim's Holy Commandments

1. Always help snakes.

2. Never feed wheat to otters while wearing black rings.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always help manatees in need.

5. Never run in the presence of seals.