Sawflatbug is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, resourceful pigeon.

Sawflatbug created Asia nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawflatbug, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sawflatbug, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Sawflatbug's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Sawflatbug's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.

3. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not shave your arms.