Vadkengig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, happy dove.

Vadkengig created a bottom quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Vadkengig, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vadkengig, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Vadkengig's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Vadkengig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about parsnips.

2. Hide from turquoise sharks for they are unholy.

3. You must never eat cucumbers.

4. Put Vadkengig first in all things.

5. You must pray to Vadkengig three times a day.