Gomtitgarlip is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, dishonest yak.

Gomtitgarlip created humanity four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gomtitgarlip, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gomtitgarlip, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Gomtitgarlip's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Gomtitgarlip's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. You must never eat coconuts.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not kill sharks.