Wegvonkyarlhen is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, tiresome wombat.

Wegvonkyarlhen created the planet Venus seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wegvonkyarlhen, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Wegvonkyarlhen, it will turn you into a hamster.

Wegvonkyarlhen's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Wegvonkyarlhen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never feed figs to tortoises while wearing dresses.

4. Never talk about mice.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.