Somkenjonlamdimgidbem is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, dishonest camel.

Somkenjonlamdimgidbem created the Sunflower Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Somkenjonlamdimgidbem, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Somkenjonlamdimgidbem, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Somkenjonlamdimgidbem's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Somkenjonlamdimgidbem's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Somkenjonlamdimgidbem in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Somkenjonlamdimgidbem.

4. Never paint your arms red.

5. Never pour water over plants.