Midlambam Hivkikfig is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, selfish horse.

Midlambam Hivkikfig created the Tadpole Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Midlambam Hivkikfig, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Midlambam Hivkikfig, he will think nothing of it.

Midlambam Hivkikfig's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Midlambam Hivkikfig's Holy Commandments

1. Learn four new languages a year.

2. Always help sick snails.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never think about comets.