Fossgepveenlen is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, prudent crocodile.

Fossgepveenlen created carbon three million years ago.

If you believe in Fossgepveenlen, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fossgepveenlen, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fossgepveenlen's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Fossgepveenlen's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Fossgepveenlen.

2. Erect four tin sculptures of Fossgepveenlen on top of important buildings.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not hurt frogs.