Donxembun is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, witless swan.

Donxembun created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Donxembun, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Donxembun, he will jump up and down on your head.

Donxembun's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Donxembun's Holy Commandments

1. Donxembun loves swans, so they must be honoured.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Hide from cyan horses for they are unholy.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never think ill of sick goats.