Barngidvan is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, bad-tempered pig.

Barngidvan created the Virgo Supercluster three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Barngidvan, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Barngidvan, she will be very sad.

Barngidvan's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Barngidvan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear green clothing.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.