Jarnarnbap is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, awesome hippopotamus.

Jarnarnbap created the planet Saturn four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnarnbap, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jarnarnbap, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Jarnarnbap's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Jarnarnbap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Always treat grasshopers with great respect.

3. Never think about moons.

4. Do not leap in public.

5. Do not drink alcohol.