Gepbagkam is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, unthoughtful octopus.

Gepbagkam created the Cigar Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepbagkam, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gepbagkam, she will turn you into a puffin.

Gepbagkam's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Gepbagkam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not dye your hair purple.

3. Never hurt aardvarks.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never look in ponds.