Yarflatgessbud Likkentip is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, dishonourable tortoise.

Yarflatgessbud Likkentip created the solar system eight million years ago.

If you believe in Yarflatgessbud Likkentip, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Yarflatgessbud Likkentip, it will have a low opinion of you.

Yarflatgessbud Likkentip's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Yarflatgessbud Likkentip's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never talk about dark matter near snails while wearing magenta coats.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never wear ear rings.