Saf is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fussy chinchilla.

Saf created water six billion years ago.

If you believe in Saf, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Saf, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Saf's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Saf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Seals are not to be trusted.

5. Erect a giant turquoise sculpture of Saf in the centre of the settlement.