Canmotkim is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, dishonourable cow.

Canmotkim created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Canmotkim, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Canmotkim, she will remove you from existence.

Canmotkim's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Canmotkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not kill goats.

4. Never write about quantum mechanics.

5. Do not keep eight turtles in a large pit.