Weetinzan is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, resourceful naga.

Weetinzan created a bottom quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Weetinzan, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Weetinzan, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Weetinzan's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Weetinzan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Never talk about grasshopers.

3. Never talk about dark energy.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near ants while wearing blue scarves.

5. Never eat green fruit.