Migcunwad Genhaplad Mifhugcab is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, unselfish spider.

Migcunwad Genhaplad Mifhugcab created energy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Migcunwad Genhaplad Mifhugcab, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Migcunwad Genhaplad Mifhugcab, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Migcunwad Genhaplad Mifhugcab's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Migcunwad Genhaplad Mifhugcab's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five tapirs approach from the north.

2. Do not wear zinc on your body.

3. Hide if nine voles approach from the west.

4. Never hurt dolphins.

5. Do not make images of living things.