Dottengod is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, pitiless gerbil.

Dottengod created carbon five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dottengod, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dottengod, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Dottengod's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Dottengod's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter near dogs while wearing green shorts and balancing seven silver spheres on your chest.

2. You must pray to Dottengod five times a day.

3. Run away if nine foxes approach from the east.

4. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

5. Do not stand on grass.