Laknigominstip is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, charitable goose.

Laknigominstip created the universe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Laknigominstip, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Laknigominstip, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Laknigominstip's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Laknigominstip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics near mice while wearing magenta coats and balancing four nickel spheres on your feet.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never write about enzymes.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Laknigominstip.

5. Do not kill doves.