Lungoftagrill is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, boastful raccoon.

Lungoftagrill created matter two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lungoftagrill, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Lungoftagrill, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Lungoftagrill's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Lungoftagrill's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured horses.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics.

3. Do not speak about peas.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not cook food in pots.