Kabmonnut is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, humorless badger.

Kabmonnut created humankind four years ago.

If you believe in Kabmonnut, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Kabmonnut, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Kabmonnut's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Kabmonnut's Holy Commandments

1. Learn five new languages a year.

2. Always help hamsters in need.

3. Do not hurt tortoises.

4. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

5. Kabmonnut loves manatees, so they must be honoured.