Raplagvog is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witty fish.

Raplagvog created dark energy three million years ago.

If you believe in Raplagvog, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Raplagvog, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Raplagvog's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Raplagvog's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

4. Never write about stars.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.