Rulsterlarn is a god.

He takes the form of a small, awesome finch.

Rulsterlarn created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Rulsterlarn, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Rulsterlarn, he will refuse to believe in you.

Rulsterlarn's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Rulsterlarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Always treat doves with great respect.

4. Never think about fluid mechanics.

5. Always stare at clouds.